TToT – Back From My Break
A friend recently told me that she wasn’t aware I was taking a break from posting here.
Neither was I.
But it seems that’s exactly what I’ve done. Other than my TToT posts, the last few weeks have indeed been something of a blogging break here. It’s not a bad thing and I’m not apologizing for it. I’ve seen bloggers here and there put up gushing posts about how sorry they are that they’ve been missing. I’m not doing that.
Why on earth would anyone apologize for focusing their attention on real life? I’m owning my break. Honestly? I feel like it’s a great sign that I’m doing exactly what I’ve been thinking and talking about for so long – making the choices that I know are best for me and my family and not second-guessing myself. OK, so stepping back from the screen here for a few weeks wasn’t exactly intentional, but it happened. And it’s been a good thing.
For starters, I’m getting more sleep. More often than not, my writing time is late at night after Zilla is in bed and the chores for the day are finished. Using those hours to get to bed and get a good night’s sleep has helped me become not only more rested, but also slightly calmer and able to better handle the flying crap life likes to hurl at me every now and then. While I never enjoy intense periods of deadlines – especially back-to-back ones – I’m coming through this stretch in a much better frame of mine than I have before. Not perfect; just better. That’s something I’m very thankful for. But I suspect my Husband and Daughter are pretty thankful for that as well.
The Hub has been – as he always is – wonderfully supportive and understanding. He doesn’t complain when dinner is leftovers. He doesn’t mind taking dinner duty every now and then. In fact, I think he’s pretty proud of himself when he gets an edible meal on the table. He keeps things running around here when I have to stay longer at work to get things done. I have always been thankful for how hands-on and involved he is with Zilla. He helps her get her homework done, keeps her busy with games and craft projects, and jumps in to do whatever she needs. It eases working mother guilt quite a bit knowing my Kidzilla is so well cared for by her Fab Dad. Admittedly, much of the reason he can handle the after school hours is that we have not yet pulled away from this long period of unemployment and transition to our New Life yet. But I’m choosing to see it as a blessing for all of us – somehow, we’ll look back on all of this as a period of distinctly positive change for all of us. Of course we’re not happy that the Hub lost his job. But you can’t put a price tag on the time he’s had with Zilla.
We are so pleased with Zilla’s fantastic school reports over the last week. Five out of six days running we’ve had nothing but very positive school days. She’s doing a terrific job and we are both so proud of her efforts. She’s really working to make good choices and handle herself well. ADHD is hard – for anybody. I think older kids and adults have an easier time understanding what it is that makes them tick and figuring out how to handle themselves. On a day when I am having trouble focusing, for example, I can usually pinpoint why and make adjustments to get by. It has to be so much more difficult for Zilla. Children her age just don’t have all those skills in place yet. They may not understand why they feel the way they do on a given day. The Hub and I work so hard to help her learn and understand those parts of her makeup. And we are always thankful that she is so intelligent and so intuitive in general – it makes helping her understand herself so much easier. In the long run, that’s going to be a great thing for her. She’s a gift, our Zilla. And she has many gifts. We want her to be able to recognize them and see them as strengths always. I think she kind of gets it and for that I am very thankful. I’ve seen too many kids – too many adults – in the world who don’t realize what wonderful people they are and suffer so much hurt because of it.
Our daughter gets a nod here for orchestrating a night out for the Hub and I last night. It wasn’t her initial motivation, but it was a nice by-product. She was making plans for herself, actually. Weeks ago, we purchased a copy of Frozen on DVD. We held it back, though, for a moment when it seemed right to reveal. After her great stretch of days at school, the Hub thought this week was a perfect time. I suggested to Zilla that a Frozen movie night would be a great idea for this weekend and that maybe we should invite my Mom to join us since she hasn’t seen it. Zilla took that suggestion and ran with it. By Thursday afternoon, Zilla was arranging arrival times at my Mom’s house and told the Fab Hub and me that we could go out to dinner while they watched their movie, thank you very much. The Hub heard all of this and assumed there were plans no one had told him about. My Mom assumed we had agreed on something that she had forgotten to write down on her planner. The truth was, though, that Zilla had planned out the whole thing and spread the word. As it turns out, Mom and Zilla enjoyed the movie and a pizza while the Hub and I enjoyed a meal where neither of us had to cut anyone else’s food or remind anyone to put two cheeks on the chair and sit still.
This morning I have enjoyed a lovely, cool, and not-quite-sunny morning to sleep in a little. I was going to get up early. I didn’t. And I’m OK with that. I did get up and about earlier than either Zilla or the Hub, though, and so enjoyed some quiet time alone. As a result, I got to enjoy another great thing this morning.
The Hub and I have not yet let go of keeping Zilla’s bedroom on a baby monitor. I know, she’s almost six. Don’t judge. We need to know when that child is awake and on the move. Because of the still-present monitor, though, I just had the pleasure of sitting here in the kitchen listening to Zilla wake up, stretch, and start humming and singing before her feet have even touched the floor. She finally came down to say good morning to me and get some hugs and kisses. I sent her upstairs to roust her Fab Dad and now am listening to the two of them goof around and be silly.
Now that the Hub is awake, I can get some coffee…and that is something for which I am always thankful. That man makes THE best coffee in the world. Always has.
Have to mention here how grateful I am to my blog friends who have continued to pop over, even given the dearth of material. And to those who have e-mailed to see how I’m doing, check in, chat, etc. – thank you. It means a lot.
And just because it’s been far too long since any of the Rotten Cats have appeared here on the blog, I’m tossing in a gratuitous Rotten Cat picture because A) I need a photo and B) how cute is this cat?
![20140316_210041[1]](http://www.themeaningofme.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/20140316_2100411-e1396712476668.jpg)
In all seriousness, though, I’m pretty glad to have these three Rotten Boys in our life. They are sweet and funny and incredibly entertaining. Case in point – Cat Two was stretching on top of the kitty tower here. He may or may not have rolled off it just after his stretch.
Share your moments of thankfulness from this week in the comments or link ’em up!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Love this? Share the love and tell someone!
39 Comments
Comments are closed.
Sounds like you’re having a great break. I agree that you should own it & focus on you. From everything I read in your post just now, that’s exactly what you’ve been doing. Sleep is a beautiful thing & I’m glad things are good with Zilla. I’m thankful for some downtime I have right now to catch up on some blogs before the busy afternoon & evening I’m going to face.
I think sometimes we all just have to take a step back and survey the landscape a bit – see where we are and decide where we need to go. I guess that’s what I’m doing right now.
Yes, Cat Two most certainly did fall off the tower post-stretch. He is not a Graceful Cat. I enjoy watching him fall off things…beds, half-walls, counters… and especially enjoy the ones where he ever-so-confidently leaps his small, stubby self onto a promontory only to be surprised by whatever obstacle to his landing comes shockingly into view…and then he manages to *change direction* mid-jump. Now, only if he could work on his post-surprise touchdown.
Also, yes I am happy when I manage to surpass the merely edible level of food preparation (doesn’t happen often) but I am always happier when I get a significantly better prepared work of art on my plate! 🙂 I will happily defer kitchen time at any time!! 🙂
Cat Two can’t help it that he is the runty little small boy of the family. He tries to keep up with the big boys. But at least he makes up for his lack of size in presence.
Your culinary skills are far beyond what they were when we met. And if you get the grill tank filled this week, you can get in more practice! 🙂
No only presence, but comedy as well.. Just to be clear, though, it is only funny because his clumsiness never actually leads to injury.
I’m glad this time away has been really good for you. That’s great, and it sounds like you’re all thriving on it.
Fab Hub sounds thoroughly deserving of his title. I remember when Husby first started learning to cook, and it was a pain to talk him through everything, and now he’s great at it, and frequently takes over, which gives me a nice break 🙂
Your cat pic is really funny 😀
Yeah, it’s been good. Sometimes it’s good to just take a step back and see how things look and decide where to go next.
The cat pic is great, isn’t it? Because my cats are really funny.
Nothing wrong with letting the, (whatever forces and currents within us all, who find blog writing a good thing), ‘muse resting time
True enough, Clark. I love writing here, but sometimes even the things we love need a little fresh air.
Oh my goodness, I love the kitty picture, Lisa!! And congrats on Zilla having a great run at school. I can imagine that dealing with a condition she doesn’t fully understand yet is quite difficult, but you two are great, supportive parents, and she’s very lucky to have the two of you.
I’m glad you got to enjoy a surprise dinner out, your daughter is indeed amazing setting this up for the two of you 🙂
Have a great weekend, Lisa!
I know – how cute is he???
Zilla has had a really good week – we are so proud of her. She’s a smart little girl and I think she really does try to understand herself and how all of this works. We’re glad that we can help her – we know now that both of us have had our versions of ADD/ADHD since childhood, but those were decades in which it wasn’t as well-known or understood as it is now. So we’re hoping that ends up being a great help and support for Zilla.
And we’re pretty lucky to have a little social organizer – perhaps she felt we needed a night out!
I wholeheartedly agree that no one should apologize for taking time for themselves. We need to nurture our souls too and live. Sometimes I think that we get too caught up with what to write that we forget that we need to be present.
Kids are friggen amazing and Zilla sounds like on of them. She’s working really hard and you are doing a magnificent job…ok I will say the husband too only because he didn’t complain about leftovers. 🙂
It’s too true that women somehow feel like we need to make this apology – but so not right. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we can’t take care of anyone else.
Zilla IS amazing – in so many ways. Kids really are amazing. Sometimes I think they handle life far better than adults do! And the Hub never complains about leftovers – he loves my cooking and is always so appreciative. And if the family is willing to enjoy leftovers, it just makes life so much easier on a school night. I usually plan at least one or two nights where we work from leftovers – it’s actually kind of fun to have a little smorgasbord!
I have noticed more than once that you and I have had new post notices passing in the night….the late, late night….when both of us should have been asleep. I am trying to be a more responsible adult about bedtime lately too. (with varying levels of success!)
LOL – I’ve always noticed that about us, too, May! It is kind of comforting to know somebody else is awake in the wee hours. 🙂 But I really am trying to get a better handle on that late night thing – like you said, with varying success. I think it’s worth it, though, to not feel so bedraggled the next morning. It helps with my stress…and that helps the whole house’s stress levels!
OK, I can never get that excited about a cat, but the rest of the week sounds fan-damn-tastic! Special yays to Kidzilla for a good week. Look, I understand ADHD–at all levels. It’s got its perks, and they’re important to remember, but boy, does it have its challenges.
Again, good for you for knowing what you needed and DOING it in spite of habit and expectations.
We live in super-immersion ADHD land here – have it, teach it, parent it…the works. It definitely has its challenges, like you said. But I guess we live in the camp that works to focus on how to handle and overcome that part and really capitalize on the strengths. The earlier Zilla learns how to do that, the more tools she’ll have to work with. It’s a battle some days for sure – but one worth fighting.
OK, so the cat – come on, can’t you get just a little excited about him? He’s so freaking cute. And I’m a cat hater. If I can be swayed, anybody can. 🙂
Lisa, I will say this. Just the tone of your post tells me the break has been worth it. Your writing feels very relaxed. I know you’re still busy and life keeps on keepin’ on but I think taking a break has done you good. And I am glad.
Look at your Zilla, playing date master for her mom and dad 🙂 Good for her!
I would never judge about the baby monitor. I say if it makes you feel better, so be it. I have bionic hearing so I don’t need one and my ears are always on high alert with my kids. It’s comforting.
Hmm…now there’s something grand! “Relaxed” is not a word people use when speaking of me – like ever. But I’m striving for that, so perhaps I’m on to something!
Zilla’s pretty cool, isn’t she? My Sister suggested that perhaps Zilla sensed that we needed a night out together – maybe she’s right. That kid has always been particularly sensitive to people’s feelings, facial expressions, etc. She’s very perceptive.
Yay for Zilla and her good week!
Sounds like everyone got some good one on one time thanks to her planning for the weekend activities. What a nice surprise for everyone.
Thank you for not apologizing. No one should ever apologize for not writing. That sleep time is important, and I started doing the same thing before vacation. Good for you.
My little social director – she’s just too funny. It was a surprise, really, and we all rolled with it. I heard that tiny voice in my brain saying “but I have all those grades to post by Tuesday…” but the rest of my brain told it to sit down and shut up. All things in due time.
YEAH FAM!!!
Yeah, hubs! coffee , goofing with the zilla, making edible meals!
Yeah You! took a much needed break to catch up …. ick deadlines!
Yeah Zilla! who besides spongebob (my personal hero) wakes up singing? and getting good reports!!!!!
Yeah Rotten Kitties! Just for being so rotten and cute!
Hey, we have our own personal cheering section!
The only other person I know who wakes up singing is my Mom. Used to drive me crazy growing up. 🙂
Love it when you post pics of the Rotten Cats!
Just snapped another good one – have to save it for later in the week. They really are too cute for words.
I remember when I took a very long break from my blog (which I still seem to be doing, only posting every few weeks), and you told me not to worry about it, that our blogs are for us and we should only post when we feel like posting. I have taken that to heart. Life should be our main focus.
I would never judge you about having a monitor in Zilla’s room. Our children are so precious. I always want to know that my kids are safe at all times, even when they are a hallway away. I’m surprised I don’t have monitors in my kids’ rooms now, at 13 & 17 years of age 🙂
I definitely saw myself slipping into a bit of posting for the sake of it and I realized that was not what I wanted to do here. I’m so much happier posting less often.
I hear you – I think I’d keep one on her forever if I could. Just to make sure she’s OK. 🙂
I love you. I do. And I am SO glad you are pacing yourself and taking good GOOD care of yourself, setting priorities and making important decisions for your peace of mind… it clearly shows in your writing!!
Love that you use the baby monitor… it’s the best invention EVER. You use it as long as your mama heart needs. NEVER judging here.
I would LOVE to drink your hub’s coffee!!!
Keep taking care of YOU.
XO
You’re not the only one who said my writing was different this week. I guess that’s a good thing!
My Hub’s coffee is truly amazing. I am SO spoiled!
I am definitely trying to take care of me so I can take care of them. 🙂
Thanks for visiting!
You always write the BEST posts, Lisa! I love that Zilla has had a string of great days at school, I love that she orchestrated a whole night out that made everyone happy, I love that Fab Hub wrote a comment, above, I love Rotten Cat #2’s picture and can clearly imagine the look on his face when he rolled right off the kitty tower. And I continue to pray that Good Things happen on the job front.
Thanks, Dyanne!
I also LOVE that Zilla is doing well in school. And how can you not love that she planned that whole social evening for everyone? She’s quite a kid.
Yeah, the Hub almost never leaves comments, so I was pretty surprised to see one. He loves those cats, though. Cat Two was completely insulted when he rolled out of that stretch and right off the tower. He was so indignant. He’s our small boy so anything that makes him seem even more diminutive bothers him. Such an attitude! And I think only another cat owner can fully appreciate the humor of a cat falling off a tower like that. Truly entertaining.
We are still hoping and searching and working to get that break into the Hub’s new field…and we pray a whole lot! Thanks for tossing yours in there, too. 🙂
Nothing wrong with taking some time to live your life! Enjoy!
Very true! Have a good week, Kate.
I still have the baby monitor too. I will likely have it for years. It allows me to move around the house and know I won’t miss a “Mommy?” if it comes. And here’s to taking time for yourself. Seriously. My husband lets me sleep in on the weekend and although I still wake up at 6:30, and it takes me 2 hours to fall back asleep, I put the pillows over my head and cherish that time. Or, I get up at 6:30 and cherish the quiet. Both are great. AND yeah, ADHD – not easy. None of this stuff is when it comes to challenges. We do the best we can. HAHA to “two cheeks in a chair!”
You’re so right, Kristi. I don’t want to miss even a whisper of her needing me. And with the impulsiveness factor, well, it’s a nice extra measure of awareness for me. Sometimes it’s nice just to hear her playing or reading to her dolls – moments I’d miss otherwise.
This weekend, I was awake before everyone else and thoroughly enjoyed the quiet. Zilla joined me after a while and we let the Hub sleep in for a change – usually he’s the one who heads downstairs first. It was a nice switch.
“Two cheeks on the chair” feels like our constant refrain right now – otherwise, Zilla is hanging off the chair or perched like a little bird on the edge. Too cute, but we figure the school cafeteria people will appreciate it if we make sure she’s used to sitting completely in the chair to eat!
I agree with you wholeheartedly! Sometimes you just need to shift your focus, devote your time to other things and pick up where you left off later. It can be very very refreshing!
Also, I’m starting to think our cats are related…
Does your cat do silly stuff like that as well??? How entertaining are they?
I’m enjoying the focus shift completely. Not that wasn’t enjoying the blog, but it was feeling like a chore and I didn’t want that. This way has been good.
Starting to move past all these big deadlines, though – finally – and I just may be feeling like doing some new posts again.
Any kid who orchestrates family nights is a keeper in my book. Way to go, Zilla!
There’s certainly nothing wrong with taking a break from blogging to “do” life. Especially when you’re all doing so well.
xo
She’s a keeper! The break has been really good in so many ways – unintentional, but it has turned out to be a very good thing.